Sunday, April 5, 2009

Mother vs. Woman with Children

I came across an ad campaign that was for "Woman with Children", not mothers.  

And now I am a little upset, why would someone who is a "mother" not want that title?  Why wouldn't you want to be a "Mother" why would you prefer "Woman with Children"?  Please enlighten me.
From my point of view, an infertile woman who never knew if I would get the chance to be mother, I want everyone to know I am a mother, it is one of the many hats I wear, along with Wife, Daughter, Sister, Friend, Professional, Stylist, and Consumer.  Motherhood is a career, a duty, a lot of responsibility. So why would I ever want to hear it as something less.

"Woman with Children" sounds like an accessory, like "Woman with House", seriously.  My daughter is not an accessory she is my responsibility.  My daughter and future children are not in my life because I wanted to add to my portfolio, to make me appear successful or more well rounded or as a step on some ladder.

I choose to be a mother because I wanted the chance to teach my children, to learn from them.  I choose to be unselfish and to give tons of time for many years to help my children.  The time period between learning of my infertility and the placement of Charlee in my home, I had lots of time to think about being a mother and if this was something I wanted to become, not just something to check off the to do list.  It was something I desired from within, something I needed for me.

Being a mother is more than buying kids things, it is more than putting them to bed, and getting them to the right activities at the right time.  I wanted to have the experience of helping my children discover who they are,what they want to do and how I can help them get there.  I want to provide stability and to be a source of unwavering love and support.  Sure Charlee is only 5 months old, but that doesn't mean my life hasn't changed and I have taken this lightly.

So to you marketing/advertising people who want my dollar and want me to love your product and spread your word you better recognize me as a mother and a woman all wrapped up in one, but if you want to sell to "Women with Children" and not to "Mothers" I will take take my money elsewhere.


Amy E. said...

Here, here! Well said! I'm giving you a standing ovation!

I'm not a mother, but I have one and have many fabulous examples of women who are mother's in every sense of the word. I would never want to diminish or disrespect the significant contribution they make in my life or in the lives of their children.

Kim said...

AMEN sista. I agree, being a "mother" is the best title and the best job in the world. SO grateful for it.