Thursday, April 24, 2008

We did not come from a cookie cutterville or go to cookie cutter college.

Okay, so there is PLENTY of things I should be and could be doing right now, but I have to take a minute and just breath, or vent I don't know what you call this.  

Here is my vent:  We are not perfect, we will never ever be perfect.  I don't want to be perfect I want to be who I am.  Okay, so here is the deal.  I am trying to get some adoption information together for our yard sale.  Which by the way, is shaping up quiet nicely, and I will be blogging about that next week.  Anyway, so I am have been surfing, looking for ideas trying to get my creative juices flowing.  I have been to too many adoption websites,  and blogs, I have seen too many profiles and perfect pictures.  So, I have been looking at profiles and websites with my agency, as well as any other agency I can find on line.  And I think I am going to scream, because there is so many families waiting to adopt, and if I was a birthparent who is considering placing  a child, and I was trying to find the right couple for my child, I would be a little overwhelmed.  Secondly, I want to know how these people have all perfect pictures and the perfect life.

I don't care what someone else's profile says, or what pictures they use.  As long as they are happy with it, I honestly and truly don't care.  Plus know I feel like a heel because I KNOW how much time and effort is put into doing something like that, and who am I to say anything?And in all truthfulness I do hope all of these families have the chance to adopt, they are good people who do deserve an opportunity to be parents. So I really can't be worrying about that.

However, the only thing I can control or have an influence over,  is our profile and our blog.  My biggest worry about our profile and even our blog, is that is won't be real.  It won't be the truth or the real us.   We are happy with who we are and who we have become and it would be an injustice to not be true to that.

So, for me, Kim and my peace of mind.  I am going to tell you a few of the unperfect things that are in our life.  We try to grocery shop together, and for the last 5 months we have only gone once a month, not because I am so prepared and organized that I can shop for a whole month, but because I don't take the time to plan a menu, or to think of effective meals to have.  Especially with the busy season,  you just never know what time dinner is going to be. If it wasn't for our good friends who have had us over many times for dinner, we couldn't have done it.  We have ate a lot of baked potatoes, pancakes, and dang quesadillas for dinner.  However, 

 we have had plenty of Pepsi, Dr pepper and Rockstar in the fridge.  So I would like to think that if we had children now, it would be different that there would be some type of menu plan, but for now this is working.

I am not a morning person, I don't like to talk to people in the morning and I hate to share the bathroom.  I want to be able to use the sink, the mirror all the drawers and whatever else I need all at the same time and if someone is standing at the sink brushing their teeth it could make me crazy.  Karst is the morning person he is so talkative, relaxed in the morning.  And sometimes I  give him,  the "it's morning, I am getting ready and you are in front of the sink talking", look.   But come late at night he is fast asleep and I am just getting started. 

When I am home I want noise, the tv, radio or ipod are always on.  Once in a while, for Karst I will have it quiet, but then I do point out to him that I am sitting in silence for his peace of mind.
We are not fast decision makers, our families want to kill us when they are trying to make plans and we have the "I don't know we haven't talked about it" answer.  So at Thanksgiving everyone is wanting to know what we are doing for Christmas, and we don't know and won't know until probably the 15th.  Why is the basement not finished?  We can't figure out what we want to do.  Why did we live in our house for 5 years before we finally painted the white walls?  We couldn't decide on a color.  It took us years to decide when we were ready for a family.  For the most part it works for us and we are good with it.

Okay, thanks I feel a lot better. So when you are reading our blog, or looking at our pictures and you think what a weird thing to say or why would they post that picture it isn't very cute.  BECAUSE THAT IS WHO WE REALLY ARE!!  


Vanessa Shannon said...

I think you guys are great! Keep being you because that is what I like about you!

illustamper said...

Who would want it any other way?! You guys rock!